I read an article this morning – and it inspired the following post.
So, being single at 28 doesn’t mean I’m desperate, but it does mean that I’m choosing to sacrifice my desires for God’s desires and plan.
I’m Not Desperate, Just Single.
Please stop stigmatizing my singleness
. . .
First off, let me say – I LOVE this article. It touched my heart and gave me renewed sense of purpose.
Second, I will tell you that I live on the other side of this discussion – not just because I am in my thirties, but also because I am single, having married and divorced in my twenties.
For years . . . absolutely years, I heard “Just give yourself some time. You’ll decide to move on at some point and meet someone new.”
Well, I tried that. Before I re-dedicated my heart and life to God, I tried NOT being married and having the full-on relationship. I went from one-night stands to serious committed relationships to casual dating and “hooking-up”.
And I have to point out right here that I had a pretty impressive track record for a girl who was told over and over and over in high school that she would never be attractive to men unless she dropped about 50 pounds. Amazingly enough, I did lose about 30 pounds after my divorce. And then I got involved in a relationship that lasted over two years – and when that one ended, I was actually heavier than I was in high school. So I spent my wild years in relationships with men (not all handsome, but not all dogs either) who found my plus-size figure attractive enough. . . No, I’m not condoning my behavior – I’m just pointing out that size doesn’t make as much a difference as everyone would like to think.
After I decided my crazy, mixed-up, messed-up ways were not the best way to go about things, I decided I needed to get married again.
Clearly, since I reside once again in the world of the single life, that was a mistake.
I did not wait for God’s leading.
I did look for signs from God, but I was seeing them in the wrong places and still going about things all the wrong way. So it’s really no wonder that things ended . . . badly.
And once again, I heard the well-wishers who proclaimed that all I needed was to give my heart time to heal.
But here’s the thing (and it’s really the most important thing) . . .
It’s not about what I want.
GOD knows – so much better than I ever could – what is the right way for me, what is the right thing for me.
If I had listened to God . . . if I had waited for God . . . my life would be very different right now.
I might be married . . . I might not . . . But my life would definitely be very different.
THIS TIME, I am determined to wait for God’s plan. I am determined to wait for God’s will! And if that means I spend my life without a husband, then THAT is what I am going to do!
It doesn’t matter that my entire family looks at me like I’m damaged goods.
It doesn’t matter (though it really does hurt) that the families in our home-school organization look at me like I’m being rebellious and strong-willed. I know why I’m doing this and IT. IS. WORTH. IT!
So, from the other side of marriage, I have to agree with Rachel on this aspect, at least – it is more important that we do what WE KNOW GOD wants from us and WE have to make the choice to FOLLOW HIS leading!
IN GOD I TRUST!